Sunday, June 30, 2013

Intimacy and God

I read that nature is the countenance of God. Acts 4:32   Big words mess up stuff sometimes. Countenance meant facial expression or simply expression of. 

Matthew 18:19 is the "Agree as touching" verse ...
This came to my mind some time later as I was intrigued,  mesmerized by the properties of the mercury in a cup from a broken glass thermometer. I swirled the little perfectly round BB’s in the cup and they appeared like little solids until they touched (agree as touching) and became one big glob of the same substance. Could this be how the Father and the Son are? Of one accord—“if you have seen Me, you have seen the Father?” Yet they were separate little things a moment ago. Could this be like the trinity example of water being  vapor, liquid, ice? Three forms but the same substance (faith is called a substance)? He sits at the right hand of the Father and …He doesn’t know the hour but the Father knows…Jesus is a separate being but He IS God--in a way we cannot comprehend since there is very little to demonstrate heavenly things to us. I believe He is God like in Proverbs 8 around verse 21 or so when Jesus says that HE was “brought forth out of everlasting.” I see that the Father was doing the creating and doing it for the Son.  He is the “only begotten Son” so is this His heavenly birth-- being brought from the bosom of the Everlasting Father? He is just a piece of God the Father—and yet has his own choice.


Deep Thought:  “Mankind is a mystery. Basically it is made up of two separate words,  mank and ind. .....What do these words mean? It is a mystery, and that’s why so is mankind.”


HA HA  just wanted to lighten things up since I can be heavy on the brain sometimes and if we do not understand earthly things, HOW oh HOW shall we understand heavenly things?  

 Back to my trying to find the knowledge of God (hmm…I wonder if He wants me telling this?)

Now this will tie in a little fancy like. Hugging. From where did it originate? I went through this phase where I HATED being hugged, by most everyone. I was 18 or 19. It really bothered me when I read a bumper sticker, “Have you hugged your child today?” ehhhhk. Who started this little overrated ritual I wondered? Why do people feel the need to get all up in one’s personal space? Why do people even value this? I could understand running from the airplane to your long lost best friend or your found dog running toward you but the day to day stuff like at church or in WalMart just irked me to no end. The fake hug—ehhhk. That’s those really light ones.

 What does this skin merging have to do with mercury or God or intimacy? I assumed maybe hugging was universal. That maybe it began with Adam and Eve. unlearned. not fake.  Perhaps it was natural and if so, what did it mean? The flesh gets nothing out of it or at least mine didn't. It seems to be a spiritual/emotional thing. It made me think that real hugs that were unlearned must have been the attempt to get soul substances together into one big glob or “body.” A church body in the Spirit, even? Now I do not think we will all be physically ONE (even though Jesus prayed we would be one as He and the Father are one) in Heaven but that we will have our own body—but maybe it will be so intimate that we can like spirits vapor into and out of one another like how Jesus walked through a door or how spirits walk through matter. Besides all that—I am getting to the point of two becoming one. Agreeing as touching. Best Friends. We are the temple and the body of Christ. Lastly I believe hugging is the act of pressing our souls together to get them as close as possible but our unglorified flesh gets in the way—a block. This is where marriage and sex become a gift and beautiful:


Sex is a way for a physical representation of oneness. She is vulnerable accepting and trusting him inside of her own body—the closest a human being can get to the raw you. But God can be inside your heart, dwelling. Husband cannot touch her heart like God can.


So you see pornography is nothing more than perverted idolatry. Married sex is a physical picture we can understand about the specialness of oneness and intimacy two can share like the spiritual (not physical) oneness of Heavenly things.   Ever been in love? Your favorite person—you want more and more of them until there is no way to hug any tighter or no more hours in the day to spend together. You cannot get enough of this person and you want to be CLOSER. Sex was God’s answer.   His gift or countenance for us to behold to understand spiritual oneness.  

Before you think I am off my rocker or worse a perv—God has a pattern of making a lot of physical things to represent spiritual things. I happen to believe unashamedly that sex is one of those things. I have read that the Jews teach their children the Song of Solomon and its not “dirty” like we over here see it. Thanks Hollywood, burn in hell. 

Personal Experience with God:

Sitting in a church in Mobile, AL…I was praying. “God please give me an example to follow..a good Christian man instead of these I have been with.” I heard in my thoughts a thought that wasn’t my own: “I AM.” 
How strange and final.

That was my answer for the request of a fiancé?

Okay—God wanted me to focus on Him. So I choose to go to a Christian College and focus on Him. Shortly after meeting my Christian suitemates, this comes across from their room to ours and I believe whoever wrote it was inspired by God just like the Holy Bible because it confirmed what I experienced! Here Goes:


Everyone longs to give himself completely to someone, to have a deep soul relationship with another, to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But, God, to a Christian says, “No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled, and content with being loved by Me alone, until giving yourself totally to Me, to have an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone, discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, will you be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with Me exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop PLANNING, stop WISHING, and ALLOW Me to unfold the most thrilling plan existing—one you cannot imagine. I want you to have the best. Please, allow Me to give it to you.

    You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things, keep experiencing the satisfaction that I AM.       
Keep listening and learning the things that I tell you. Just wait, that’s all. Don’t be anxious. Do not look at the things you think you want. Look off and up to ME or you will miss what I want to show you. AND THEN, when you are ready, (I am working this moment to have you both ready at the same time) and until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I have prepared for you, you will not be able to experience the Love that demonstrates your relationship with Me and this perfect love. And dear one, I want you to have the most wonderful love (I AM Love).    I want you to be able to see that your earthly relationship in the flesh is a parallel I have created to show your relationship with Me in the Spirit. And, I want you to enjoy concretely and materially the everlasting union of beauty, perfection, and love that I offer you with Myself.  
Know that I love you…utterly.
I AM the Almighty God. Believe it and be satisfied. 

Maybe when we get to Heaven, there will be millions of best friends because we can be one or separate and we will all be of one accord/one mind and purpose—INTIMACY!!!




Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The Enemy tried to Destroy my 7 year Old's Faith

I walked my 7 yr. old up to the bus stop. He asked me, "Mama, why does God let dogs get hurt?"
This was a deep question for him to announce. Little background here--his dog was named "Black Jack" and was a stray black lab mix. He was a sweet dog that everyone in the neighborhood loved. Well, almost everyone. He saved us during Hurricane Katrina by barking like crazy when a water moccasin was trying to get into our laundry room door. It was a dual--but that's another story!

I said to my inquisative son, "Son, I don't know but what I do know is that the Word of God says that Jesus is right now preparing a place for us where Lions and wolves lay down with lambs and they will eat hay." I do not think God designed it to be this way. He leaves on the bus for elementary school.

I had the day off and was able to spend time at home that day alone so I went to the computer to find answers to his question. Christian I think is where i found a fascinating article. I printed the article off for us to go over later and just to keep.

Before he came home, Black Jack did something very weird. It was cold outside and he was sitting inthe middle of the yard looking at the front door barking incessantly. I opened the door to speak to him and he stopped. I walked out and over to him and I noticed he was soaking wet. It was cold, so this was odd. Then I noticed it was blood!

A second later, a neighbor from about a mile up the supdivision bottoms out in my broken driveway to tell me what has happened to my dog. Two pit bulls attacked him in the street (they had gotten out of their fence to get him). Two different neighbors tried for half an hour to beat the pits off BlackJack. They shook his brain and made him dumb. He was permanently brain damaged and the sweetest dog you could know before but even more so after.

Then here comes the school bus to bring the kids home!! OMG! I had to pick this animal up high into the back of my SUV and feared him biting me inthe face...husband wasn't home yet. Nerve wracking.
We got him to the vet. Blood everywhere! He stayed overnight for a couple nights (4, I think). We didn't know if he was going to "make-it."

When the vet called and said she thoguht he would make it, we were all relieved. Afterall, we were praying for this pet. The next morning, my same son woke up and said, "Mama, I just had a bad dream of something like a Lion or bear or a roaring sound over me." Immediately, my mind went to the scripture  I Peter 5:8 "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: "

I think the devil was out to destroy the heart and faith of my middle son. I think he was angry that Black Jack was not destroyed and he roared over my son.

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Exchanging Presents for Presence Christmas 2012

A week before Christmas I told Steve Demme (Math U See) via email that my family was not the kind of family that does devotion challenges. I asked for prayer for my family to become more like that. I know other homeschool families that have devotions and well, I only wish my husband would lead our guys like that.

 Rewind three weeks earlier...I got a letter in the mail out of the blue with 60.00 cash in it from an anonymous "angel." They had heard my Christmas tree had been destroyed and that I would not be getting another one. Had it had an appropriate container, this would not have happened but we never found the money to invest in a container that was sturdy. I had just been given an amazing tree the day before with a sturdy container! I used the money for gifts for our gift swap at our local homeschool Christmas party for each of my family members and some yarn to make scarves for a couple of gifts. We were both out of work and broke with three teen boys.
My son asked, "Are we going to have presents this year?" I didn't know what to say, but, "Well, a tree sorda promises that doesn't it?"  Boy, did I have a lesson and a bless'n comin'....

On Christmas day, I was alone as most of my family worked late into the evening. I was very sad but kept cleaning slowly and not very effectively. I think I was having my own Chrispity party. I have boys ages 12, 14 and 15 and we had NO GIFTS AT ALL this year. I just had the nativity scene under my tree. I was trying to be mature about it. People *say* that the real meaning of Christmas is love and family and being thankful BUT when you have three kids and nothing--well, that's walking the walk, ain't it?  I called a friend to wish her a Merry Christmas and *LIED to her when she asked me what I got for Christmas. They are wealthy and tend to recoil at the difference my life contrasts to theirs. I made up some gifts and it was tearing at my heart as I did it. I got VERY sad afterwards as I do not lie easily. I prayed but I felt no better. Finally it welled out of me as I hid my face into a cover and cried and boo-hooed. There were a lot of things I could cry about but I wasn't sure which of them was causing this involuntary outburst. I apologized to God that praying to Him made me feel no better, "I am sorry, I am just sad, God.....boohoooohoooo"

Straighten yourself up, Melanie, I said with my "big girl panties" on. You need to count your blessings and pull out of this junk...boohooohooo.

In my Chrispity party, I did say to God, "Well, you could have at least let it snow since we have no presents and I have never had a white Christmas."  Nothing worked to get me out of mully -grubbing despair until my husband called from town and said, "We are bringing company home to spend the night."  WHAT?! Oh no, I have to get up and clean. I acted irritated but I was excited. He went on to explain that it was strange sorda but this *male* acquaintance brought gifts for each of us. They were

godly books called "Grace for Each Moment", "199 Promises of God", "How to Detect Satan and Defeat him" and for my husband and I "Growing Together as a Couple"...a nice sentiment, but I thought--a lot of good that will do--they all hate reading and they wont even read their Bibles. Because it was a *male* friend, this made a difference. I started realizing this was a hint from God that it IS possible for this family to have devotions. I was quiet and kept this in my heart until the next morning when we discovered a double rainbow across my front yard. And guess what? It snowed!

After I reflected on all that happened over the holyday, I learned a valuable lesson. This is for the mature in Christ--I do not think just anyone can receive this. When you are weary in well doing and hate the way things are, there is something called the "sacrifice of praise." You do not feel like celebrating or praising God because all you can do is feel sorry for yourself because of the hidden idols in your heart. When you do not do what feels "natural" and pout and wallow in depression, but put on praise music and worship God because He is worthy whether you feel it or not, your mood will change just like magic. You will have joy running over the brim of your cup. You will have to call someone and love on them you will be filled with the Spirit. I truly think this is one of the keys to the Kingdom of God that is within us. So many blind people seek a doctor or a pill--we miss God when we do.