I guess God was after me to become pure. He was definitely watching me and checking things. All of this happened in one month. I am so grateful:
I shopped at the Goodwill store a lot when I was without the boys. I can’t tell you how I went broke saving money! One day, a new item had been donated by the store and I was in there to shop in the last 15 minutes before closing. It was a strong, gorgeous purse, unusual. “Eight dollars?!” “This is the Goodwill, people!” Yes, I know, that’s really not bad but I was an aggressive bargain hunter and could find better deals. The cashier was annoyed by my pondering this purchase because she really wanted to lock up and go home. She rang me out and was locking the door, keys wringling, as I studied the receipt outside. “Hey, she forgot to ring up the purse” I noticed. Oh well, when I come back in next week, I’ll just pay for it. So, a few days pass and I begin to rationalize (after spending my other money) that I don’t have to rush back there—after all, it was their mistake. Why should it inconvenience me? I thought, I do a lot of business there and they really aren’t going to miss it. It was given to them! It could have easily been given to me. So, I pull in my friend’s driveway for just a moment to say hi, not getting out of the car. My very young son was in the car with me. She compliments me, “What a cute purse.” My son just spills out to my adult friend, “She stole it!” We both looked at him…eyebrows wrinkled...awkward. Well, just what could I say? So, I said, “WHAT?! Why did you say that?” He had no idea why he said it. Things that make you go hmmmm..
A week later, I go swimming at a local creek with my threee boys. I happen to see my "first love" of several years. The nostalgia of it was exciting but I was acting calm, cool, and collected. I hadn’t seen this person that I dated six years of my life in over 15 years. I introduced my children and he introduced his. We were just into asking how the parents were, standing at the water’s edge when my young child, in the most innocent, sweet voice, says to me and him “Is that your husband?” Well, my first love was taken aback, literally stepping away physically though he was not in my personal space but he seemed shocked with a nervous laugh. I was shocked, embarassed and dumbfounded until I realized that the Holy Spirit is like some quality control manager of my marriage, my life. Yes, this same child about the “stolen purse” had spoken a precise word in due season, again. I hadn’t even had adulterous thoughts, YET. We laughed it away but there was nothing else to say, really. The excitement dissolved before it strengthened. Now this must have been a trying time for me and my marriage because I was dealing with the spirit of adultery (if there is such and I am sure there probably is). I would get mad at my husband, harden my heart, and remember the verse that tells me if I do that I will fall into calamity (crisis). But…..
I was taking a different son out on a “date.” I had a few errands to run before our date officially started and would be seeing a man in this that was my husband’s friend. He had kinda flirted with me before and said that I always “looked good.” So, as I was pulling the mascara through my eyelashes close up to the mirror, my son wanders up and says, “you know, Mom…you might not look pretty to other men, but you are beautiful to me.” OOOOOOO-K. The mascara brush halted. What noone but me and the Lord knew is that I was NEVER around other men and had no idea where he was coming from except that at that exact moment my heart was meditating on things exactly matching his strange little statement. I wanted attention and to feel good. By the way, if my husband reads this, I blame him for letting me feel that vulnerable. I knew right then by the third time that God was on me like white on rice!
So, I paid for the purse by way of donation AND when I have a stray thought toward another man, I pray and renounce outloud anything that sets itself up above God and His ways. I pray for that man's life.
I shopped at the Goodwill store a lot when I was without the boys. I can’t tell you how I went broke saving money! One day, a new item had been donated by the store and I was in there to shop in the last 15 minutes before closing. It was a strong, gorgeous purse, unusual. “Eight dollars?!” “This is the Goodwill, people!” Yes, I know, that’s really not bad but I was an aggressive bargain hunter and could find better deals. The cashier was annoyed by my pondering this purchase because she really wanted to lock up and go home. She rang me out and was locking the door, keys wringling, as I studied the receipt outside. “Hey, she forgot to ring up the purse” I noticed. Oh well, when I come back in next week, I’ll just pay for it. So, a few days pass and I begin to rationalize (after spending my other money) that I don’t have to rush back there—after all, it was their mistake. Why should it inconvenience me? I thought, I do a lot of business there and they really aren’t going to miss it. It was given to them! It could have easily been given to me. So, I pull in my friend’s driveway for just a moment to say hi, not getting out of the car. My very young son was in the car with me. She compliments me, “What a cute purse.” My son just spills out to my adult friend, “She stole it!” We both looked at him…eyebrows wrinkled...awkward. Well, just what could I say? So, I said, “WHAT?! Why did you say that?” He had no idea why he said it. Things that make you go hmmmm..
A week later, I go swimming at a local creek with my threee boys. I happen to see my "first love" of several years. The nostalgia of it was exciting but I was acting calm, cool, and collected. I hadn’t seen this person that I dated six years of my life in over 15 years. I introduced my children and he introduced his. We were just into asking how the parents were, standing at the water’s edge when my young child, in the most innocent, sweet voice, says to me and him “Is that your husband?” Well, my first love was taken aback, literally stepping away physically though he was not in my personal space but he seemed shocked with a nervous laugh. I was shocked, embarassed and dumbfounded until I realized that the Holy Spirit is like some quality control manager of my marriage, my life. Yes, this same child about the “stolen purse” had spoken a precise word in due season, again. I hadn’t even had adulterous thoughts, YET. We laughed it away but there was nothing else to say, really. The excitement dissolved before it strengthened. Now this must have been a trying time for me and my marriage because I was dealing with the spirit of adultery (if there is such and I am sure there probably is). I would get mad at my husband, harden my heart, and remember the verse that tells me if I do that I will fall into calamity (crisis). But…..
I was taking a different son out on a “date.” I had a few errands to run before our date officially started and would be seeing a man in this that was my husband’s friend. He had kinda flirted with me before and said that I always “looked good.” So, as I was pulling the mascara through my eyelashes close up to the mirror, my son wanders up and says, “you know, Mom…you might not look pretty to other men, but you are beautiful to me.” OOOOOOO-K. The mascara brush halted. What noone but me and the Lord knew is that I was NEVER around other men and had no idea where he was coming from except that at that exact moment my heart was meditating on things exactly matching his strange little statement. I wanted attention and to feel good. By the way, if my husband reads this, I blame him for letting me feel that vulnerable. I knew right then by the third time that God was on me like white on rice!
So, I paid for the purse by way of donation AND when I have a stray thought toward another man, I pray and renounce outloud anything that sets itself up above God and His ways. I pray for that man's life.
amen....lord does he ever speak through our kids...i need to share some of my moments with God and my kids..
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